Lynn and Andy P: Addressing Your Son’s Addiction

Addressing Your Addiction

Lynn and Andy P. are the parents of Drew P., a resident currently in Phase III of Turnbridge’s  drug rehab program.  While in his addiction, Drew’s family relationships were strained because of complete distrust and constant stress in the household.  Since coming to New Haven, Drew has taken the opportunity to address his addiction and begins to repair the damage to his relationships with his father, mother, brother and sister.

According to Lynn and Andy, Drew’s problems with drugs and alcohol began in high school.  Around that time, Drew began to drift away from the family and there were clear changes in his behavior.  The first major warning sign came on Christmas day when Drew was sixteen years old.  He disappeared without warning from a family gathering and when his father finally found him late that night, Drew was using with friends.  This event marked the beginning of a period in which using and drinking were Drew’s priority.  “We saw a steady decline over the years in which Drew’s partying became his main focus,” says Lynn.  “That was all he seemed to care about.  It eventually cost him friends and jobs and the privilege of living at home.”  

Throughout his high school years, Drew’s life at home and at school were in constant turmoil due to his substance use.  Drew began surrounding himself with an unsavory crowd and spending as little time as possible at home.  “He would make himself so scarce that the only time we ever got to talk to him was about some big problem,” says Andy.  “It didn’t take long before [Drew] took the point of view that, ‘there’s nothing I can do to please these people, so I’m just not going to,’ which led to a horrible downhill slide in our relationship.”  

After graduating from high school, Drew’s substance abuse issues continued to escalate.  His parents sought help from therapists and tried multiple tactics in attempts to evoke change in Drew’s behavior, but he continually was unable to meet expectations or stay within set boundaries.  Eventually it got to a point where Drew’s parents gave him a choice: go to treatment or find another place to live.  “Things kept adding up until we had enough,” says Lynn.  “He was obviously living a life in which partying was the most important thing, and we just couldn’t support that anymore.”

 A family counselor recommended several treatment options for Drew.  After speaking with a Turnbridge employee on the phone, the family decided that the Turnbridge long term rehab program was Drew’s best opportunity for recovery.  Drew made the decision to seek treatment and came to New Haven in the summer of 2014.   Drew has been committed to the program since his arrival.  He has taken time to focus on himself, which has changed perspective and enabled him to begin to build relationships based on mutual respect with all of his family members.  “In the past, there was always an agenda when we needed to talk to him,” says Lynn.  “Now it’s more of a caring relationship on both ends, and I feel like our other two kids have gotten their brother back.”